2014 Dodge Challenger Shaker: Image Is Everything

Sometimes, image can trump everything.  In the case of the 2014 Dodge Challenger Shaker, image could be said to be the only thing.  The priciest non-SRT version of Dodge’s retro-styled muscle car doesn’t add any measurable performance compared to the base Hemi-powered Challenger R/T, but it justifies its steeper window sticker by selling you on the fact that it looks like it just rolled out of a showroom in 1970.  Turn the Challenger Shaker’s ignition key and this perception is further reinforced by the twisting of its namesake hood scoop that sits directly on top of the motor and juts through a hole in the hood like a big middle finger pointed at all the world’s Mustangs and Camaros.  This big-bodied coupe is all about attitude and emotion, not performance, and it turns out that a surprisingly huge percentage of buyers are completely ok with that.

What’s Big And Orange And Right Behind You?

Some cars attract attention due to their beauty, their ultra-loud exhaust tuning, or their perceived status in the automotive pecking order.  The 2014 Dodge Challenger Shaker that I drove for a week sucked eyeballs out of their sockets because it was big, bright orange, and every inch a modern replica of the original Challenger muscle car that roamed the streets in the years before $1.50 per litre gasoline.

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There’s no question that the Challenger Shaker is the best-looking of the current domestic coupe crop, true to the long hood / short deck / beefy haunch proportions that have long set red-blooded men salivating, but when one of these outlandish rigs rumbles past a row of flat-footed pedestrians the stares you are getting aren’t just in appreciation of its eye-searing paint.  They’re more likely to be linked to a deep cultural memory ingrained in our fetishization of muscle cars and the Baby Boomer version of the 60s and 70s, and given that there’s nothing in the marketing playbook more powerful than nostalgia – not even sex – it makes sense that the Challenger Shaker is a big hit.

All Hat And No Cattle

What doesn’t quite compute is the performance side of the Shaker equation.  You’d figure that the car’s prodigious air intake – which can be heard sucking in copious amounts of oxygen at speed – would be able to at least perk up the Dodge Challenger’s 5.7-liter Hemi engine as compared to the base R/T’s identical unit.  Sadly, you would be wrong, because despite the presence of a Mopar-sourced cold-air intake under the hood (which the Shaker intake feeds through a rear-mounted channel), you’re getting the same 375 horsepower and 410 lb-ft of torque as those paying many thousands less.

Sure, you also get 20-inch rims and the word ‘Shaker’ emblazoned all over the vehicle (I counted four mentions in the cabin and two on the scoop itself), along with the contents of the Super Track Pack, which adds in the CAI mentioned above along with a stiffer suspension system, quicker steering, and three-mode stability control.  Truth be told, even with a six-speed manual transmission riding shotgun the 2014 Dodge Challenger Shaker isn’t an engaging vehicle to drive in the same way that the Ford Mustang GT manages to be.  Acceleration – if you can get the car to hook up – is a modest 5.5 seconds on the sprint to 100 km/h, and on the no-cost-option Goodyear Eagle RSA all-season tires I was only able to post a 13.99 in the quarter mile.  Once you’re out of third gear the Challenger Shaker’s surge tapers off, with the Hemi lazily delivering its output through the remaining three ratios.  Blame the car’s two-tonne curb weight and massive size, which also manage to dampen the fun when negotiating a corner but which provide a comfortable ride and more interior room than in any other muscle car.

Still Fun To Be Had

And yet, despite my disappointment at the 2014 Dodge Challenger Shaker’s mid-pack performance, there’s still some fun to be had from behind the wheel.  Even though I grew up long after the original pony car wars were a memory, I was steeped in that culture by my family and learned to love big cubic inches producing more power than the rear tires could handle.  To be honest, I enjoyed simply cruising around in this bright orange beast with a hole in the hood, and if you like attracting the attention of young children, curious adults, and local law enforcement then you will too.

The new Challenger will lay down as much rubber in the parking lot of your local high school as your best friend’s did that one time he managed to borrow the keys from his dad, and regardless of whether it’s actually fast or not, the Challenger Shaker still looks like it will crush all comers.  With attitude like that you can ignore the guy in the Subaru WRX revving his engine in the lane beside you.  In fact, it’ll be better for your ego if you do.